For Christmas, I recieved a book of strange history from our dearest Xtina. So here's a few fun history facts to pass the time that I found pretty damn funny. No, really, these are great. In order from what I though was comical, to falling over laughing:


8. In October 1987, a Chinese pig farmer, Chen Bohong of Liuzhou, was busy slaughtering a pig when he was interrupted by a taxman who presented him with a bill. Chen was so angry by the interruption, not the bill, that he stopped what he was doing and killed the taxman, soon going back to slaughtering the pig. (Just a busy man at work! Dooty-doot-doo...)

7. In September 1994 in Messina, Italy, a patient who was being treated for paranoia shot his psychiatrist. He commented later: "He never liked me." (Way to get ahead in life.)

6. German emperor Wenceslas, a violent, unstable drunk, was out hunting one day when he came across a passing monk and shot him dead: he explained that monks had better things to do than wander about in the woods. (Reckon it was monk-season.)

5.German-borne Amy Weltz went to her wedding in Brisbane in September 1993 unaware of the Australian custom of smearing wedding cake in your spouse's face. When her new husband Chas rubbed a slice of wedding cake in her fade during the reception, she quickly responded by smashing a bottle over his head, killing him instantly. (Lack of communication = bad.)

4.Eye-witnesses recorded that when the head of Jean Paul Marat's assassin, Charlotte Corday, was held up and slapped by the executioner, it showed unmistakable signs of anger. (I'd be mad if I got slapped after death, too. This actually goes on to talk about how, in Russian science research, the blood of a living dog was pumped into someone's head later on to prove the theory that we live for a few minutes after decapitation. The head responded with a look of shock. o.O)

3. Murderer James Bullen was sent to the electric chair at Sing Sing in 1932. He recovered on the way to the cemetary, leaped out of the coffin and ran of, but was caught later on. ("Shitfire, I ain't dead. Can't catch me, Mastuh Douglas! ::runs off::")

2. In 1927, when George V's wife Queen Mary attended the funeral of her brother Adolphus, the procession was interrupted by the sound of her brother's body exploding nosily inside his coffin. ("Alright, let's get him down to the cemetary and--::BOOM!::")

1. In 1994 Los Angelos police were alerted to find a peeping Tom. Apparently, the man specialized in dressing up as the grim reaper, with a scythe in his hand, and staring through the windows of nursing homes at old inmates. (I could NOT stop laughing after I read that.)

Laugh on! It's good to laugh, isn't it. ::also kills someone randomly::








Your Friendly Neighborhood Historian,

Murphy